Some vignettes tell a sad story and some tell a happy story. This one tells a little of both.
I recently attended a funeral viewing service honoring the memory of the deceased who died in her early fifties. Needless to say her mother was devastated. No parent wants to outlive her children.
This mother had three other adult children who attended the service. They all lived near enough to drive to the service and return to their respective homes on the same day. One of the surviving children was a son who had not spoken to, or visited his mother, in over 10 years. I do not know the cause of their estrangement. It is not important to the telling of this story. I am not even certain that the mother and the son now even remember the cause. Ten years is a long time to remember anything with accurate detail.
The mother said to me,”I think that is my son there, across the room. I’m not sure. I’ll go see.” That is the sad part of this story.
After the church service, everyone gathered at the mother’s home for refreshments. I am pleased to tell you the wayward son and his wife were also in attendance. The mother and the son gradually and tentatively gravitated toward each other. Very timidly at first and then later, not so timidly.
When I left the house my last view of the gathering was seeing an animated discussion between the mother and son who were seated in the living room close together. That is the happy part of this story.
Did the death of a daughter/sister bring the two together? Who knows?
I would like to think that it did.
©2008 by John Daly copyright 2008 by John Daly
2 Comments
Your piece above reminds me of the resent deaths of my parents. My mother died in July after a long battle with cancer. Estranged from his family for more than 10 years, my father refused to let his family attend her funeral. Unfortunately, 10 weeks after my mother’s death, my father died unexpectedly from what we found out was years of cancer growing in his colon and spreading throughout his body. On his death bed, he agreed to see some members of his family to reconcile before he passed. Since he is one of 8, all of his siblings were not able to visit on short notice. He died with some guilt in his heart, only to possibly reconcile with it above. Why die with a heavy heart? Every family member sat at that funeral pausing to think about the arguements and grudges they held against each other for years. Was it worth it…..
Marcella, I am so sorry about losing your parents. I’m sure it would have been easier on you without all of the conflict mixed in, though it never would have been easy.